The idea is simple. I’m not THE man, just A man fully surrendered to God. The full story though is much deeper. So grab a coffee or your favorite beverage and relax while I pour out onto your computer screen.
I started blogging a long time ago. Long before the internet was cool, before computers were everywhere and way before coffee cost $5 but came with free wi-fi. My earliest blog was pretty bad so I’m not even going to talk about it, but lets just say I was a confused and sometimes angry little man.
So I shut it down and lived my life for many years. The key word in that last sentence was “my”. I did what I wanted to, when I wanted to, with whomever I wanted to and on it goes.
I was selfish on some levels, scared on so many other levels. I had a great talk and looked to be living a successful life. I had a good paying job, great co-workers, a wife, pets, a house in the burbs and more. If you met me on the street or came to my home you’d think I had it all together.
You’d think I was living the American dream.
I was living the dream and it was VERY American. My life revolved around being married to a hot woman who was career driven and just as successful as me. We had a big house with more bedrooms then we needed but manged to fill them with furniture and stuff. We both drove “luxury” cars and made sure they always looked their best. Dressed in the best clothes, ate at the best restaurants and lived life.
The thing with dreams is that at some point you wake up.
I was jolted awake from my dream. It was one of those jolts where you wake up and it takes you a few minutes to figure out where you are and what’s going on. You pillow has an nice drool spot on it and the sheets are wrapped around you as if trying to constrict you from getting out of bed.
It was too late for me, my path has been choosen. In a matter of months I started to realize things and what sucked the most is there was nothing I could do to change it. I was in a job which had no real future for me. My wife and I were getting a divorce. My house was now worth 50 thousand dollars less then what it was a year ago. This was my wake up call. It was at this moment that I was FORCED to turn to God and really listen and give it all to him.
It was my turn to surrender and I was all to happy to do it. The next year was a whirlwind of activity as I learned what I meant to be a REAL Christian. To really trust God, to put my faith in Him and to not only listen to Him but HEAR Him and follow Him.
My journey isn’t done and it never will be done. But the difference is that I wake up each day fully surrendered to Him. It’s a constant struggle and not an easy thing to do but I’m making it happen. My hope is that this blog, my words and experience will be a light to you and your path. I hope through my openness, my reality, my surrender that you too will surrender.